Uhf
Put down your remote control
Throw out your tv guide
Put away your jacket
Theres no need to go outside
Dont you know that we control the horizontal
We control the verticle, too
We gonna make a couch potato out of you
Thats what we gonna do now
Dont change the channel
Dont touch that dial
We got it all on uhf
Kick off your sneakers
Stick around for a while
We got it all on uhf
Dont worry bout your laundry
Forget about your job
Just crank up the volume
And yank off the knob
We got it all, we got it all, we got it all on uhf
Disconnect the phone and leave the dishes in the sink
[...] Read more
song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
Taco Grande
Taco... grande. taco... grande
Yo quiero chimichangas y chile colorado
Yo tengo el dinero para un steak picado
Las flautas y tamales, siempre muy bueno
Y el chile relleno
You see, I just gotta have a tostada, carne asada
Thats right, I want the whole enchilada
My only addiction has to do with a flour tortilla
I need a quesadilla
I love to stuff my face with tacos al carbn
With my friends, or when Im all alone
Yo tengo mucho hambre y ahora lo quiero
Un burrito ranchero
So give me something spicy and hot, now
Break out the menu, what you got, now?
Oh, would you tell the waiter Id like to have sour cream on the side
You better make sure the beans are refried
Taco... grande. taco... grande
Well, theres not a taco big enough for a man like me
Thats why I order two or three
[...] Read more
song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
Stuck In A Closet With Vanna White
Doctor, every night I have the strangest dreams
Doctor, listen to me, tell me what this means
First Im goin shoppin in my underwear
Then all of sudden Im floating in mid air
My lips fall off and everybody starts to stare
Donuts and hot dogs are flying everywhere
Now doctor, wait a minute, you aint heard nothin yet
Next comes the part that I wont ever forget
Now Im bein followed by these russian spies
They give me some velcro, and an order of fries
Suddenly Im bowling on the starship enterprise
I fall down a hole and thats when I realize
I am stuck in a closet with vanna white
Im stuck in a closet with vanna white
Night after night after night after night
All right!
Doctor, wont you tell me, am I going insane
Was it something I ate or something wrong with my brain
See, Im naked in church when I meet a dinosaur
Try to run, but my feet have been nailed to the floor
[...] Read more
song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
Everything You Know Is Wrong
I was driving on the freeway in the fast lane
With a rabid wolverine in my underwear
When suddenly a guy behind me in the back seat
Popped right up and cupped his hands across my eyes
I guessed, is it uncle frank or cousin louie?
Is it bob or joe or walter?
Could it be bill or jim or ed or bernie or steve?
I probably would have kept on guessing
But about that time we crashed into the truck
And as Im laying bleeding there on the asphalt
Finally I recognize the face of my hibachi dealer
Who takes off his prosthetic lips and tells me
Everything you know is wrong
Black is white, up is down and short is long
And everything you thought was just so important doesnt matter
Everything you know is wrong
Just forget the words and sing along
All you need to understand is
Everything you know is wrong
I was walkin to the kitchen for some golden grahams
[...] Read more
song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
I Was Only Kidding
When I said that Id be faithful
When I promised Id be true
When I swore that I could never
Be with anyone but you
When I told you that I loved you
With those tender words I spoke
I was only kidding
Now, cant you take a joke?
When I said that I need you, baby
When I told you that I really care
When I said that I cant live without you
When I said Id follow you anywhere
When I said you could always trust me
When I said Id never leave you flat
Well, guess what? I was only kidding, baby
I cant belieeeeve you fell for that! youre so gullible...
(I was only kidding) I was only kidding
(I was only kidding) you thought that was for real?
I was only kidding
Now Im sorry if you misunderstood, but the fact remains
[...] Read more
song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
Amish Paradise
As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain
I take a look at my wife and realize shes very plain
But thats just perfect for an amish like me
You know I shun fancy things like electricity
At 4:30 in the morning Im milkin cows
Jebediah feeds the chickens and jacob plows... fool
And Ive been milkin and plowin so long that
Even ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone
Im a man of the land, Im into discipline
Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin
But if I finish all of my chores and you finish thine
Then tonight were gonna party like its 1699
We been spending most our lives
Living in an amish paradise
Ive churned butter once or twice
Living in an amish paradise
Its hard work and sacrifice
Living in an amish paradise
We sell quilts at a discount price
Living in an amish paradise
[...] Read more
song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
WANNA BE UR LOVR
I don't have a library card
But do you mind if I check you out?
I like your skeletal structure, baby
You're an ectomorph, no doubt
Your face is real symmetrical
And your nostrils are so nice
I wish that I was cross-eyed
So I could see you twice
Girl, you smell like Fritos
That's why I'm giving you this hungry stare
You're so hot, you're gonna melt
The elastic in my underwear
I'll bet you're magically delicious
Like a bowl of Lucky Charms
You'd look like Venus de Milo
If I just cut off your arms
What I'm tryin' to say is...
I wanna be your lover, baby
I need somebody to love
You know I just wanna be your lover, baby
[...] Read more
song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
The Hot Rocks Polka
If I could stick my hand in my heart
Spill it all over the stage
Would it satisfy you
Would it slide on by you
Would you think the boy is strange
Aint it stra-a-ange
If I could win
If I could sing
A love song so divine
Would it be enough for your cheating heart
If I broke down and cried
If I cri-i-ied
I said, ah no, its only rock n roll
But I like it
Ah no, its only rock n roll
But I like it, like it
Yes I do
I really really really really do do-do do do
Hey
Gold coast slave ship bound for cotton fields
[...] Read more
song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
I Cant Watch This
I cant watch this. I cant watch this
I cant watch this. I cant watch this
My my my my tv makes me so bored
Makes me say, oh my lord
What is this garbage here?
Wanna cover my eyes and plug my ears
It sucks, and thats no lie
Its about as much fun as watching paint dry
Lowers my iq one notch
And thats the reason why, uh, I cant watch
I told you homeboy... I cant watch this
Yeah, nothin but trash and you know...
I cant watch this
Poke out my eyes, man... I cant watch this
Yo, gimme that remote control... I cant watch this
Talkin bout sick shows
Teres americas funniest home videos
I cant believe my eyes
When I see the kind of stuff that wins first prize
Somebodys poor old mom
[...] Read more
song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!
The Alternative Polka
loser by beck
Soy un perdidor
Im a loser, baby
So why dont you kill me?
Soy un perdidor
Im a loser, baby
So why dont you kill me?
Hey!
sex type thing by stone temple pilots
I am I am I am
I said I wanna get next to you
I said Im gonna get close to you
You wouldnt want me have to hurt you, too
Hurt you, too
I know whats on my mind
I know you like whats on my mind
I know it eats you up inside
I know you know, you know
Here I come I come I come I come
Here I come I come I come
[...] Read more
song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!