When I Was Your Age
Let me tell you sonny... let me tell you straight
You kids today aint never had it tough
Always had everything handed to you on a silver plate
You lazy brats think nothings good enough
Well, nobody ever drove me to school when it was ninety degrees below
We had to walk buck naked through forty miles of snow
Worked in the coal mines twenty two hours a day for just half a cent
Had to sell me internal organs just to pay the rent
When I was your age. when I was your age
When I was your age. when I was your age
Let me tell you something, you whiny little snot
Theres something wrong with all you kids today
You just dont appreciate all the things youve got
We were hungry, broken and miserable and we liked it fine that way
There were seventy three of us living in a cardboard box
All I got for christmas was a lousy bag of rocks
Every night for dinner, we had a big ol chunk of dirt
If we were really good, we didnt get dessert
When I was your age. when I was your age
When I was your age. when I was your age
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Buy Me A Condo
Gonna buy me a condo
Gonna buy me a cuisinart
Get a wall-to-wall carpeting
Get a wallet full o credit cards
I gonna buy me a condo, never have to mow de lawn
I gonna get me da t-shirt wit de alligator on
Wo, used to live in jamaica but I dont live dere no more
Had to change me lifestyle
Do tings I never done before
So now Im just a lonely rastaman
Living in dis american town
Gonna sell me bob marley records
Gonna get me some jackson browne
I gonna buy me a condo
Gonna buy me a cuisinart
Get a wall-to-wall carpeting
And get a wallet full o credit cards, eh
I gonna buy me a condo, never have to mow de lawn
I gonna get me da t-shirt wit de alligator on
Wo, gonna cut off me dreadlocks
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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My Babys In Love With Eddie Vedder
Oh, my baby, my baby she dont want me no more
Ever since she saw his poster in that record store
She says the way he grinds his molars is really sexy
She thinks hes so darn dysfunctional and generation xy
She likes his brooding angst and his wild-eyed stare
Yeah, hes her very favorite slacker multi-millionaire
Well, my babys in love with eddie vedder
Shes all crazy bout that eddie vedder
Once she was mine, but now I better just forget her
cause my babys in love with eddie vedder
Now, every time I see him, well, he looks so grim
I guess it really must suck to be a rock star like him
What a pain in the butt to have so much success
Spending all his time moping and avoiding the press
But my girl cant get enough of his sullen demeanor
Like hes some big tortured genious and Im some kinda wiener
Well, my babys in love with eddie vedder
Shes got a thing for that eddie vedder
Tell me, what can he do that I cant do better
Now my babys in love with
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Waffle King
It took a lifetime, but I finally found
The perfect waffle recipe
Youll never find a batter any better in this whole stinkin town
One little bite and Im sure that youll agree
Your eyes roll back and your knees get weak
Aw, youre gonna lick your plate clean
People come from miles around just to study my technique
I make the best darn waffles this world has ever seen
Im the waffle king (waffle king)... yeah
Waffle king (waffle king)
Thats what they call me
Waffle king (waffle king)
Hey, Im the waffle king
Everywhere I go, the people cheer
I never have to wait in line
People say, right this way, sir... your moneys no good here.
Some day I betcha theyll build me a shrine
And everybody say, well, Im your biggest fan!
I seen your picture in people magazine!
Folks come from around the world just to shake my hand
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Hooked On Polkas
["State Of Shock" by The Jacksons w/ Mick Jagger]
You're takin' to me good,
Just like you know you should.
You get me on my knees,
Please, baby, please.
She looks so great, everytime I see her face.
She put me in a state, ooh! (state of shock)
["Sharp Dressed Man" by ZZ Top]
Top coat. Top hat.
I don't worry, 'cause my wallet's fat.
Black shades. White glove.
Lookin' sharp. Lookin' for love.
They come a-runnin' just as fast as they can,
'Cause every girl's crazy 'bout a sharp-dressed man, hey!
Whoo! Ah ha!
["What's Love Got To Do With It" by Tina Turner]
Oh, what's love, got to do, got to do with it?
What's love but a second-hand emotion?
What's love got to do, got to do with it?
Who needs a heart, when a heart can be broken?
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Attack Of The Radioactive Hamsters From A Planet Near Mars
They showed up on my doorstep just a couple weeks ago
They looked so sweet and harmless
Tell me, how was I to know
They got a little too close to the microwave and then much to my surprise
They grew to forty thousand times their original size
They started mutatin right before my eyes
Oh my
Attack of the radioactive hamsters from a planet near mars
A race from a distant place
They came in ufos shaped just like cuban cigars
Man oh man, you oughta hear em squeal
Now the whole wide world is their exercise wheel
Attack of the radioactive hamsters from a planet near mars
The president, hes is a panic
The pentagon, theyre in shock
Theres a team of research scientists they got em workin round the clock
Now the national guard is out in my back yard
And the marinesll be comin around
I hope they get this lousy rodents out of my town
cause the property values are goin way down now
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Traffic Jam
Carbon monoxide
Making me choke
No a.c.
And the radios broke
Cars backed up
Far as you can see
Seems like Ive been waiting here for all eternity
Oh, and just in case youre wondering
Ill tell you where I am
Im right here (right here) right here (right here)
Stuck right here in the middle of this...
Traffic jam
I havent moved one inch from this here spot
Traffic jam
The freeways one big parking lot
Traffic jam
My radiators boiling hot
And Im stuck right here in the middle (right here in the middle)
Right here in the middle of a traffic jam
Trapped inside
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Midnight Star
I was waiting in the express lane with my twelve items or less
At the checkout counter at the local grocery store
I was only passin by
But a paper caught my eye
And I learend a few things I mever knew before
It said your pet may be an extra terrestrial
It said the ghost of elvis is living in my den
You can learn to cope with stress
You can beat the irs
And the incredible frog boy is on the loose again
Oh, mignight star
Its in the weekly midnight star
Aliens from outer space are sleeping in my car
Midnight star, I wanna know, I wanna know
Eat jelly donuts and lose twenty pounds a day
Hear the story of the man born without a head
And top psychics all agree
That the telephone company
Will have a brand new service that lets you talk to the dead
Oh, midnight star
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Bedrock Anthem
Sometimes I feel
Like I need a vacation
Sometimes I feel
Like I wanna go
To the city of cavemen
The city of bedrock
Id be a flinstone
Now Ill tell you why...
Well, Ive got Ive got a woman named wilma
Well, Ive got Ive got a baby named pebbles
Well, Ive got Ive got a doggy named dino
We do a little bowling and we drink a little vino
Well, Ive got a little buddy, barney rubble
Got a neighbor by the name of barney rubble
Hes a midget but he makes a lot of trouble
Doesnt like to shave, he got caveman stubble
Me and barney, loyal order water buffalo
Lodge brothers, loyal order water buffalo
Theres a handshake everybody gotta know
How come grand poo-bah always gotta run the whole show?
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Trigger Happy
Got an ak-47, well you know it makes me feel alright
Got an uzi by my pillow, helps me sleep a little better at night
Theres no feeling any greter
Than to shoot first and ask questions later
Now Im trigger happy, trigger happy every day
Well, you cant take my guns away, I got a constitutional right
Yeah, I gotta be ready if the commies attack us tonight
Ill blow their brains out with my smith and wesson
That ought to teach them all a darn good lesson
Now Im trigger happy, trigger happy every day
(oh yeah, Im)trigger, trigger happy
Yes Im trigger, trigger happy
(oh baby, Im)trigger, trigger happy
Yes Im trigger, trigger happy
(oh Im so)trigger, trigger happy
Yes Im trigger, trigger happy
Better watch out, punk, or Im gonna have to blow you away
Oh, I accidently shot daddy last night in the den
I mistook him in the dark for a drug-crazed nazi again
Now whyd you have to get so mad?
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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