I Think Im A Clone Now
Isnt it strange
Feels like Im lookin in the mirror
What would people say
If only they knew that I was
Part of some geneticists plan (plan-plan-plan)
Born to be a carbon copy man (man-man-man)
There in a petri dish late one night
They took a donors body cell and fertilized a human egg and so I say
I think Im a clone now
Theres always two of me just a-hangin around
I think Im a clone now
cause every chromosome is a hand-me-down
Look at the way
We go out walking close together
I guess you could say
Im really beside myself
I still remember how it began (gan-gan-gan)
They produced a carbon copy man (man-man-man)
Born in a science lab late one night
Without a mother or a father, just a test tube and a womb with a view
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Nobody Here But Us Frogs
Oh, Ive really got those ozone layer blues
From my elbow down to my shoes
So lets throw another fire on the logs
Now we can go downtown and fill the latrine
With genuine columbian lima beans
Dynastic and elastic, its all made out of plastic
Theres nobody here but us frogs
Id like to find a girl who really cares
About the size of my nasal hairs
She could feed bananas to the dogs
We could climb the church and look down from the steeple
Where all the ants look like people
Nutritious and delicious, its even surreptitious
Theres nobody here but us frogs
They say Im crazy
But I couldnt care less
Why dont they leave me alone
Cant they see that Im happy to be a psychiatrical mess
I get a thrill
Bein mentally ill, yes I do
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Spam
Spam in the place where I live (ham and pork)
Think about nutrition, wonder whats inside it now (oh boy)
Spam in my luchbox at work (its the best)
Really makes a darn good sandwhich any way you slice it at all
If youre running low, go to the store
Carry some money to help you buy more
The tab is there to open the can
The can is there to hold in the spam
Oh, spam on the table at home (ham and pork)
Think about selection, are there different flavors now (lets eat)
Spam in my office at work (its the best)
Think about the stuff its made from, wonder if its mystery of meat
If you need a spoon, keep one around
Carry a thermose to help wash it down
Now, if theres some left, dont just throw it out
Use it for spackle or bathroom grout, now
Spam in my pantry at home (have some more)
Think of expiration, better read the lable (oh boy)
Spam breakfast, dinner, or lunch (its the best)
Think about how its been precooked, wonder if Ill just eat it cold
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Cable Tv
I used to think my life was so empty
I used to think life was passin me by
Well, I was just about ready
To curl up and die
But then one day I got a visit
From the cable company
Well, they hooked me up and plugged me right in
And now I got cable tv
And now I get to watch the stock report in korean
Midget wrestling on channel three
It costs me fifty bucks a month just to see em
Yeah, but thats all right with me
I got cable tv (cable tv)
Cable tv (cable tv)
Oh, eighty-three channels of ecstasy
I love my cable tv, yeah
I love my cable tv
I got the siamese faith healers network
The news and weather from peru
I got celebrity hockey
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Talk Soup
I dated siamese twins
I slept with bigfoot, too
Get me on sally jesse
Put me on donahue
cause I wanna tell the world about it
Right now
My dogs a narcoleptic
My moms a circus freak
I gotta get a spot on
Geraldos show this week
cause I wanna tell the world about it
Right now
Im just an anorexic codependant bingo addict
Stripper born without a chin
And Im only comfortable talking about it
When the whole wide world is listening in
Talk soup... talk soup
Listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me, (listen to me) listen to me
My wife ran off with elvis
My boss shaved off my hair
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Polka Patterns
Everywhere, I see them there
I stop and stare at patterns
I dont care, I must declare
Ive got a flair for patterns
On my hair, the clothes I wear
My savoir faire is patterns
All I see is patterns
The patterns that repeat
Lets go into the bathroom
I know were in a room where you would not expect much math
Usually youre in here for a shower or a bath
But if you gaze upon the floor, and if youre kinda smart
Youll see the repetition is like geometric art
Wow, haha
Look
Everywhere, I see them there
I stop and stare at patterns
I dont care, I must declare
Ive got a flair for patterns
On my hair, the clothes I wear
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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One More Minute
(constant doo wops in the background throughout the song)
Aahh....
Well I heard that youre leavin (leavin)
Gonna leave me far behind (so far behind)
cause you found a brand new lover
You decided that Im not your kind (aahh..)
So I pulled (I pulled) your name out (name out) of my rolodex (oohh..)
And I tore all your pictures in two
And I burned down the malt shop where we used to go
Just because it reminds me of you (dippity dippity doo)
Thats right (thats right) you aint gonna see me cryin
Im glad (Im glad) that you found somebody new
cause Id rather spend eternity eating shards of broken glass
Than spend one more minute with you
I guess I might seem kinda bitter
You got me feeling down in the dumps
cause Im stranded all alone in the gas station of love
And I have to use the self-service pumps
Oh, so honey, let me help you with that suitcase
You aint (you aint) gonna break my heart in two
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Generic Blues
I woke up this morning
Then I went back to bed
Said I woke up this morning
Then I went right back to bed
Got a funny kind of feelin like I got broken glass in my underwear
And a herd of wild pigs is trying to chew off my head
You know what Im sayin
Well I aint got not money
Im just walkin down the road
Said I aint got no money, honey
So Im just walking down this lonely old road
Well, I wish I could get me some money
But I forgot my automated teller code
I was born in a paper sack in the bottom of a sewer
I had to eat dirt clods for breakfast, my family was so poor
My daddy was a waitress, my mama sold bathroom tiles
My brothers and sisters all hated me cause I was an only child
I got the blues so bad, woo
Kinda wish I was dead
Maybe Ill blow my brains out mama
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Yoda
I met him in a swamp down in dagoba
Where it bubbles all the time like a giant carbonated soda
S o d a, soda
I saw the little runt sitting there on a log
I asked him his name and in a raspy voice he said yoda
Y o d a, yoda
Yo-yo-yo-yo yoda
Well, Ive been around, but I aint never seen
A guy who looks like a muppet, but hes wrinkled and green
Oh, my yoda
Yo-yo-yo-yo yoda
Well, Im not dumb, but I cant understand
How he can lift me in the air just by raising his hand
Oh, my yoda
Yo-yo-yo-yo yoda yo-yo-yo-yo yoda
Well, I left home just a week before
And Ive never ever been a jedi before
But obi wan, he set me straight, of course
He said, go to yoda and hell show you the force
Well Im not the kind that would argue with ben
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song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Eat It
How come youre always such a fussy young man?
Dont want no captain crunch, dont want no raison bran
Well, dont you know that other kids are starving in japan
So eat it, just eat it
Dont want to argue, I dont want to debate
Dont want to hear about what kind of food you hate
You wont get no dessert till you clean off your plate
So eat it
Dont you tell me youre full
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Get yourself an egg and beat it
Have some more chicken, have some more pie
It doesnt matter if its boiled or fried
Just eat it, eat it, just eat it, eat it
Just eat it, eat it, just eat it, eat it, ooh
Your table manners are some cryin shame
Youre playin with your food, this aint some kind of game
Now, if you starve to death, youll just have yourself to blame
So eat it, just eat it
You better listen, better do what youre told
[...] Read more
song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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